You don’t know who Tim Berners-Lee is? Well you f@#king well should!

One shocking summer afternoon, only a quarter-moon ago, the piss and vinegar was sucked out of my day’s pep when I found out that my educated, professional colleagues had no idea who Tim Berners-Lee was.

Tim Berners-Lee… Tim Berners f@#king Lee!.. blank looks… my mouth gaping wide open in awe. My chest tight. Buttocks elevated ten-centimetres off my seat by my extended arms, locked elbows, nails clawing the foam underlying my soft padded office seat.

Tim f@#king god-damn Berners shitting pissing Lee!!!! Convulsing. Jittering my seat back and forth.

I’m sorry, but if you’ve ever ordered a sloppy kebab on UberEats, trashed an Air B’n’B, trolled a dolphin lover on a PETA forum or have been laid with the aid of an app, you might want to be at least aware of who this man is. *Sir* Tim Berners Lee! T.B.L if you want to shorten it!

So he’s got a knighthood? that’s great! Whoop Dee F@#king Do! TIM BERNERS LEE INVENTED THE INTERNET AND GAVE IT AWAY FOR FREE! Really? He gave it away for free? AS A GIFT TO MANKIND! For free? YES FOR F@#KING FREE!!!!

I’m aware that anti-intellectualism is alive and strong in our world today and that the meek will never inherit the earth.  So I shouldn’t be surprised. But this man’s invention has changed the life of the sports fan, the business person, governments, students, law enforcement, bogans, drug dealers, gamers, home renovators, feminists, human rights activists, chauvinists, doctors, celebrities, politicians, music lovers, bullies, scientists, copyright violators, problem gamblers, Flat Earthers, movie buffs, YouTube stars, publishers, writers, researchers, bleeding hearts, aid agencies, KKK members, the depraved!!! HE GAVE US THE HIVE MIND. And no thanks. Well, not enough thanks.

So if you’ve ever used the Internet to pay a bill, purchase pre-worn underwear, or send some flowers to your mum, you should be paying homage to T.B.L, and many of these other pioneers. Not many women you say? Well we can all ultimately give thanks to Ada Lovelace, the first computer programmer ever! Bet you haven’t heard of her either!!!!

Image of T.B.L is from the Software Sustainability Institute.

UK Tories want to “Change the Internet to control what is said Online”

Either Theresa May is an energy-drink-guzzling Dorito-smashing basement global network hacker by night, or she’s completely unaware that the internet isn’t owned by Britain (nor is it bound by any geographical boundaries).

But either way, she’s going to “change the internet to control what is said online” .

An article from the has quoted the English Prime Minister as saying “some people say that it is not for government to regulate when it comes to technology and the internet“…”We [Tories] disagree.

Not content to be playing catchup with her Chinese, Russian, North Korean and Iranian government counterparts, a Tory manifesto claims that the plans will allow Britain to become “the global leader in the regulation of the use of personal data and the internet“.

Luckily, the prophets of technology Tim and Eric came up with a technical solution to Teresa May’s problems all the way back in 2008:


We Might Have Just Come a Step Closer to Solving the Mystery of Life

A popular theory in science is that life got started when a bunch of molecules randomly bumped together in a bubbling pool of water heated by a volcanic vent roughly 3.8 billion years ago. Now Some chemists at Cambridge have come close to explaining how that might have been possible: reports:

“DNA is better known, but many researchers today believe that life on Earth got started with its cousin RNA, because that nucleic acid can act as both a repository of genetic information and a catalyst to speed up biochemical reactions. But those favoring this “RNA world” hypothesis have struggled for decades to explain how the molecule’s four building blocks could have arisen from the simpler compounds present during our planet’s early days. Now, chemists have identified simple reactions that, using the raw materials on early Earth, can synthesize close cousins of all four building blocks. The resemblance isn’t perfect, but it suggests scientists may be closing in on a plausible scenario for how life on Earth began. “

The Best Lost Insults that we need to Bring Back! has posted its list of the 12 Insults We Should Bring Back.

“Everyone knows a primo insult or two, even if your personal rules of decorum prohibit their usage. But if you think about it, there aren’t many new insults (or swear words, for that matter). The ones you heard from that guy in middle school are pretty much the same ones you hear now…[so] head back a couple of hundred years. These words/terms might seem rather quaint and out of place now, but back then, they got your attention.”

Amongst my favourites were “Gnashnab” (someone who just complains all the time),”Zounderkite” (a Victorian word meaning “idiot”) and Bedswerver (somebody who sleeps around a lot).

Feel free to post your favourites below:

How Synaptic Pruning messes with our future happiness

Like the pirates of olden days, give them a bottle of rum and any Middle Years school teacher will be happy to regale you with the adventures and bat-shit insanity they witness on a daily basis as part of their vocation.

Flipped over tables; the formerly quiet kid who has turned to loud questioning of school/society/teacher’s haircut; the year 8 girl who took the time to carefully cut out the letters in foil to decorate her History folder with the shiny phrase “lick my ass”; the amputee girl who decided to throw her prosthetic leg across the classroom at another student for some reason.*

So those who are are forced to be around adolescents as part of their parenting obligations, or worse, as part of their jobs, often find them themselves in front of an erupting volcano spitting out exploding lava bombs of moronic shit. So we turn to booze, but also science! The latter tells us that the fecal eruption we’re witnessing is most likely attributed to a physical process within their feeble brains called “synaptic pruning” (Lubman, 2007) (Blakemore and Choudhry, 2006).

Continue reading “How Synaptic Pruning messes with our future happiness”

The Best Sci-Fi Novels to Get You Reading

The authority on nerd,, has published a list of its Best Science Fiction novels for all ages.

I am mainly a reader of non-fiction, so when it comes to fiction of any kind, I am no connoisseur. But my personal favorite sci-fi novel is The Forever War by Joe Haldeman, which tells the tale of an interstellar war faught between man and a race called the “Taurans”; the novel is also a strong metaphor for the sense of alienation felt by returning Vietnam War veterans (Joe Haldeman was wounded and received a Purple Heart in the war), which perhaps also feeds my inner history nerd.

What are your thoughts on’s list? Feel free to post your personal list below:

World Video Game Hall of Fame Inductees for 2017 announced

“The World Video Game Hall of Fame — located in Rochester, New York at the Strong Museum of Play — has announced its third class of games to be honored with induction: Donkey Kong, Halo: Combat Evolved, Pokémon Red and Green, and Street Fighter 2″…. “The other eight 2017 finalists were Final Fantasy 7, Microsoft Windows Solitaire, Mortal Kombat, Myst, Portal, Resident Evil, Tomb Raider and Wii Sports” (

The first time that I saw Donkey Kong was on a black and white Rank Arena TV set and a console both built almost entirely out of wood. It is my earliest memory of seeing a video game. And I will never forget the rush of elation that I felt when I landed my first dragon punch in Street Fighter 2.

I have tried, but I cannot find rhyme or reason in the strobe-lit visual base-colour cacophony that is Pokemon. And to be honest, I’ve felt somewhat of an indifference towards first-person shooters since my mind exploded on my first play through of the original shareware Doom.

What game would you have inducted? And if it isn’t already in this list, tell us why the hell it should be.